“Is that your boy?” he said. I was standing in front of a very large saltwater aquarium when a man next to me pointed to the little boy offset a few feet to the other side of me and asked me that question.

I looked down at the little boy, who was pounding on the 6-inch thick glass at a lime green moray eel and shouting the kind of noises that only another toddler might understand. I looked back at the man who had entered my life from the right side of nowhere.

“Yes, he is.” I said.

“Well, he is a handsome little man. I love his curly hair. It’s really beautiful.” came his response in that distinct and slow Texas twang.

“Thank you”, I said.

“There really is nothing quite like raisin’ a boy, as a man.” he smiled as he mused. “I lost mine last year when he was just 19 years old.”

“I am sorry for your loss. That really saddens me to hear.” I felt gutpunched and surprised to be having this conversation.

“I hope you cherish every day with him. We take so many things for granted. Havin’ them smile at you. Laugh. Even the arguments and the unpredictability when they get older. Mine died in a car accident and it came out of the blue. I’ll never get those things back, but I am so grateful for the time we had. I love him every day. Just one more time like the time you’re having. It makes me glad to see a little boy so happy.” He said all of this as casually as he’d probably discuss the weather.

I smiled at him and he watched my son slap his little hand on the aquarium glass for a few minutes. We discussed some of the fish for a moment.

“Well, I hope he grows big and tall and you love him every day.” And then he smiled at me and walked off. I didn’t see him again.

I am not sure what to do with that conversation but to take it to heart, which I have. I guess that one will just stay with me for a while. The whole experience was just kind of serene and surreal. The boy liked seeing the fishies, in any event. That was his highlight.

In the midst of the turmoil and angst that was the 8-5 2011 Texas football season, several amusing things happened.

First, Texas ended up putting together a relatively gratifying turnaround season. 8-5 is nothing to crow about as the second winningest program in CFB history, but it sure as hell beats 5-7 and getting laughed at by every other program in the country. Beating the aggies and winding up with scoreboard was a nice touch.

Second, the QB position became so overwhelmingly absurd in all of its drama, changes, confusion and performances that the fanbase was left with an outsized view on just how dire the situation really was. The swings from last spring with “Connor Wood is pressuring Gilbert for time!” or “Gilbert is the man, just give him time!” to this past summer with “McCoy is making his move! Wood is dropping off!” or “Gilbert is the man, just give him time!” to this past football season’s progression from “Gilbert sucks!” to “Gilbert is the man, just give him time!” to “McCoy and Ash will rotate!” to “Both of these guys are awesome!” to “They both suck!” to “Case McCoy should start, he’s Colt’s brother and he beat ATM!” to, finally, “Ash sucks, but he sucks for our team, so, whatever, we’ll take him. Fuck you, Cal, you bunch of clowns.”

That brings us to now, where the general majority of fans seems to have the sentiment that Texas could be a top 10 team in 2012 if only the program had a QB it could rely on throughout the year. My contention is that it does, and that that player is David Ash, and that a 10 win season is not only in the program’s reach, but should be the expectation.

“But I saw him suck out loud for most of the 2011 season!!??!”


We all did. It wasn’t a pretty year for the guy. Statistically there isn’t much to brag about and in terms of actual viewing, things were occasionally pretty ugly. In the end, none of the issues that plagued David Ash for 2011 have to be persistent problems in the next 3 years. The problems and their solutions are as follows.


A) The Speed of the Game


Unlike Garrett Gilbert, who had about every mechanical issue that a QB can have, David Ash wasn’t broken on that front. Mechanically, he overstrided at times, he threw off of his back foot, and he had happy feet for much of his time in the pocket, but those are products of rushing the game. He still threw the ball off of his ear, not from a wind-up like a starting pitcher. He had plenty of moments where he stepped into his pass reasonably well and his step wasn’t effectively a long stride, which was Gilbert’s every move. While he threw off of his back foot too often, Ash also had his moments where he threw very well on the run when he was flushed. In short, his footwork, delivery, and vision didn’t show signs that each would be total projects to correct or that they were already in a state of bad habits that might never be broken.

Where Ash wound up falling completely short was in his decision-making in the pocket and his ball placement with his receivers. Both of these issues relate directly to the speed of the game.

The guy was barely old enough to vote when he started getting snaps in games in front of 100,000+ people. It really shouldn’t be a surprise that he wasn’t mentally prepared for the game. One of the consistent issues that we witnessed all season long was that Ash would attempt to make plays that weren’t there. He saw windows and spaces that he perceived to be available for a throw when in fact there was a defender waiting to close on the ball. Things that the guy got away with in high school simply created some bad habits in his decisionmaking that needed to be broken through adversity. As a high schooler, the guy had a big arm, good mobility (relatively speaking) and he was playing against mediocre competition, so no doubt he carried over some lazy decision-making habits into his freshman year. (Un)luckily, Ash experienced a ton of adversity by way of poor decision-making last season. A great example of this issue was on full display in the early part of the OU game in which he tried to make something out of nothing on a throw that should have never been made and Hurst, the OU defender, took the pass to the house.

Some guys never grow out of the issue that they believe their arm and physical skills can bail them out of anything and take advantage of any tiny window in the passing lanes. Brett Favre got away with this all the way to a Super Bowl title and a future in the HOF. Ryan Mallett often got away with this at Arkansas. It also cost both of those guys repeatedly. Any poster on this board could name 3+ examples of it costing Favre-led teams. The best Mallett example is from the Sugar Bowl vs Ohio State on the last drive. Attempting to throw the ball literally through a defender is never going to end well for the QB. Of course, both of those players have huge arms, so they had enough success to get away with it. The rest of the QBs tend to be mere mortals and the guys who aren’t head cases can have this issue coached out of them. There is no reason to believe that Ash can’t fit into this group. He showed improved decision-making in the Holiday Bowl and that discipline will remain a focus with this staff. On top of that, Ash is going to get the chance to face some of the most diverse playcalling packages in the country on defense in practice each day. Some things are taught through hearing and others through doing. He’ll get hit on both sides.

The other primary issue with the speed of the game for the guy was his ball placement in the passing game. Players move faster, and by a lot. The guy had to come to the realization that he wasn’t in Belton anymore. That’s a light bulb that will go off through repetition and experience. Ash basically threw behind every target he had in the KSU game. That was probably the nadir of his season in terms of throwing the ball, although I haven’t looked at stats and I have no idea if they reflect that. In any event, this is the most basic of QB issues when the QB goes up a level. Working through the tree and understanding where guys are going to be ahead of the ball releasing is something that comes with time and is a given to be learned for someone who is actually getting the reps. The speed of the game is one of the primary reasons why a redshirt year for a QB benefits them more than any other position.


B) Snaps & Repetition


When Ash arrived on campus last spring, he was the 4th string QB, given the impression that he was likely to redshirt. He was also given 4th string reps, which means he received very few compared to what anyone resembling a starter would need. He had an anointed returning starter, a top 100 redshirt freshman, and the sibling of a legend sitting in front of him.

Any human in that situation might reasonably deduce that the following fall would probably not be their time. Is that what Ash did and did that effect his preparation for some of the offseason? I don’t think anyone here knows, but it’s not an unreasonable assumption. Beyond that, even if the guy was prepping mentally like a starter, it couldn’t have done a ton of good for what he’d face, given that he was receiving roughly 5-10% of the snaps all of the way through 7 on 7 work.

Once fall drills rolled around and the season started, Wood had moved on and the staff had decided not to redshirt Ash. They clearly valued his feet and what his skill set could do in a specific package of plays. In reality, given the plays that involved him early, a case can be made that the focus on those packages for Ash as a player might have actually been a hindrance for his overall development. As his reps became more focused and dedicated to the designed package(s) for him heading into the early part of the season, his overall exposure to the offense decreased and he no longer took consistent snaps with the 2nd string O.

There’s also the issue of timing with the receiving corps and in the running game. As a 3rd or 4th stringer, or the package QB, Ash never had an opportunity to get into any kind of rhythm or develop any kind of connection with the starters. It’s one thing to have bad ball placement because the game hasn’t slowed down for the player, it’s another to have no clue how a particular WR is going to get off the line, or how long one TE may hold a block before releasing as opposed to another. Timing effects exchanges in the running game, it affects the efficacy of the play-action game, and effects the accuracy of the passes in the passing game. Each QB will develop a rapport with his WR/TE corps and gain an understanding of who he wants to go to in various situations and who will be where he needs them to be when he’s flushed from the pocket. Ash had zero chances to do any of this with the starters heading into the season. Certainly some of that began to occur as the season wore on, but the overall impact of any of that development ahead of the bowl game practices was minimal.

Another big problem in Ash’s development as a regular QB in the 2011 season was coaching focus. With a problem QB in Gilbert returning and needing a ton of work, and with an inexperienced set of back-ups behind him, the amount of energy and focus Harsin could put into Ash’s development last spring and early fall could only have been fractional. There is only so much time in the day and the expectations were not of Ash becoming the starter. Ash had opportunities to learn in the communal sense with the other QBs and beyond that, what he got in terms of focus was probably by demand or during Harsin’s down time. The amount of older player mentoring experience at QB that Ash received was probably somewhere near zero. That particular issue won’t be changing, but it’s also another reason why the guy remained so raw through last season. Something there would have helped the guy a long a bit as a supplement to the lack of coaching attention.

All of these snaps and repetition problems go away for 2012.

1) Ash is the starter. He knows it, so does everyone else, and he’s expected to be ready mentally and physically every day.
2) He’ll be exposed to the entire offense and he’ll receive the lion’s share of the snaps in every phase of the season from spring drills through the bowl game.
3) Timing with the rest of the skill players will be a given heading into the season and a magnitude shift in the learning curve will be reflected in this area for the program.
4) He’ll get all of the coaching attention and focus that he could have ever dreamed of from this staff. He’s going to be living, eating, and breathing football with the staff and players through the offseason.


C) Injuries & Teammate Experience


Any QB in the country would be put in a bind when it comes to moving the ball if he was playing behind a refurbished, thin OL going through a complete scheme and technique overhaul. That situation is going to be exacerbated when it is coupled with gratuitous injuries throughout the rest of the offensive skill player depth chart. During the season, the offense lost for extended periods: Jaxon Shipley, John Harris, Fozzy Whittaker, Malcolm Brown, and Joe Bergeron. Blaine Irby was constantly playing from behind, health-wise, as a go-to TE as well. At one point in this season, on the road, Davis Ash was asked to show success moving the ball down the field against a top 30 defense with Jeremy Hills in the backfield, and Mike Davis and Miles Onyegbule at WR.

2012 will no doubt have its fair share of injuries for the program as well. That considered, the depth across the board is better, and so is the experience. The bulk of the OL is back, with a set of actual back-ups with talent, and the scheme and technique work will be more of the same for the whole group. Shipley, Davis, Harris, Onyegbule, and the incoming freshmen will all be targets. The TB group will go 3 deep again with top tier talent and two of the players will have spent a full offseason inside the UT workout and conditioning cycle. TE depth will even be more experienced and talented if McFarland is coming along as well as rumored and Grant continues to develop as well.


”But I know what my eyes saw last year! David Ash is not the answer! Connor Brewer should starts!”


People are entitled to believe whatever they’d like. Shellshock at the QB position in the Post-Colt McCoy era is understandable. Garrett Gilbert’s general ineptitude took most people by surprise, much like his father did with various women on the West Coast during his playing career. The fanbase was not ready for the multitude of problems that were unveiled during Gilbert’s sophomore season. Poor footwork, a baseball wind-up, no composure, no leadership, a mediocre arm, and no phenomenal player development from the alleged wizard of QB coaches, Greg Davis. Only one of these issues was corrected heading into 2011 and that wasn’t enough to save the fanbase from what they witnessed. What has been seen cannot be unseen, so cynicism is warranted.

At the same time, Ash is a different player with a different set of problems and answers than Gilbert. This guy has a real chance to be developed, to learn through some adversity, and to be a part of a title-contending program. That isn’t to say that he’ll press for All Big 12 honors in 2012. He also doesn’t need to do so. All he needs to do is be reliable and viable in the passing game. With everything else this program has going for it with coaches, talent, and depth, Ash does not have to win games on his own for Texas. He just needs to be a solid steward of the offense and to control the ball. If he does those things, the experience will likely set him up very well for honors in the future. Likewise, Texas will be set up for honors going into 2013 and 2014 along with him. That considered, Texas should go 10-3 or better in 2012. If they don’t do so, it’s not going to be because of Ash that they don’t.

I am glad I am not my wife, having to deal with a baby growing inside of me, etc. I know it is hard. It would probably be an awesome feeling at the same time, but as a man I’ll never know the good or the bad of it.

What I do know, however, what I am really keyed in on, is that being the man during the pregnancy really, really sucks. Yes, it is not nearly as hard as what the female goes through. However, the psychological beatdown that a man goes through in the process doesn’t get nearly the credit it deserves.

Yes there is the issue with, phyiscally, being something of an afterthought for roughly 11+ months. Hits and misses there, but a guy can get over that pretty easily.

What’s really difficult is the warp speed emotional shifts from normal person, to batshit crazy person, back to normal person. When that cycle occurs, the one thing that is apparently not forgotten from the entire event is that whatever triggered it is the man’s fault. And that fault is something he’ll be paying for over several days.

Do the names that he is called in the process matter? Apparently not. “Numbnuts”? Shake it off. “Dummy”? “Evil Asshole”? “Your mother made a mistake!!!”. Whatever. These are apparently the sprinklings of water to run off of the duck’s back. Fine.

What would be easier than the barrage of absurdities from the temporarily insane person would be if these things were consistent. If this kind of thing is going to occur, can’t we just schedule for like Tuesday evenings or something? Why do they have to occur sporadically and randomly and without warning? I assume this is what dealing with an abusive, alcoholic parent must resemble, mentally, for a child. You never know what you’re getting next and it starts to get scary.

Beyond that, the other ridiculous things start to stack as well. Cooking dinner 5 nights in the row? Four nights of those are fine and she eats and we’re happy. Night 5? “Why can’t we just have Chicken McNuggets!!!” and then a trail of tears. It’s apparently irrelevant that I’ve never even seen the woman eat McDonald’s. I get cravings, but predicting them is something I’m just going to be short on.

It’s all worth it. I know this. The babies make it worth it. But, there’s nothing wrong with wishing to somewhat sleepwalk through the prior 9.5 months of their growth before birth is there? Come on, early January.

Everybody develops them, but some of the stuff I see boggles my mind.

The guy who sits next to me in the office has some sort of bizarre mouth fetish and it disturbs me in distracting ways. He winds up perpetually eating something, and its never kind of thing he should be eating.

Usually, he’s gnawing on his hands. I don’t mean picking at his fingers. I mean, working the flesh on mitts until they’re raw and bleeding. And he eats the flesh. He doesn’t just chew it off. He eats it. He clearly does the same with the fingernails, as those are now worn down to the very rawest as well. I see him grabbing napkins or paper towels and wringing his hands in those for a while, and then he’ll go right back to chewing. It would be annoying just having to witness it each day. Where it really gets disturbing is when he starts doing this, unwittingly I assume, in meetings. You are an executive who wants to be taken seriously, right? Then stop gnawing on your hands, dude.

When it is not hands, it’s something far worse. The old tried and true is the boogereating. Thankfully, only those sitting near him have to witness this and we’re excused from this activity in meetings. That considered, what in the world would ever make a person want to eat their boogers? I was as perplexed by this at 5 years of age as I am now.

Not handeating or boogereating? How about picking facial skin and eyebrows and incorporating those food groups into the diet? Yes? Awesome.

I’ll see this in my nightmares as an old man.

How about the guy who uses the restroom, loudly, by the conference room? There are other restrooms out of sight and out of mind, brother. Figure it out.

The female that refuses to wear a bra. I don’t care how attractive you are, mix in something that creates less of a distraction.

Finally, there is the obese person heating wet broccoli in the microwave. Listen, why is this person eating healthy in the first place? You’ve embraced gluttony about 200 pounds ago. What in the world has inspired you to stink up the entire kitchen vicinity with an odor akin to sewage for the sake of mixing in a green veggie?

Last year, as a Texas fan, I had a sense of dread as Texas went into its game versus lowly underdog UCLA. Texas had played like crap in the prior few games heading into the game and they were showing no signs in interviews and weekly comments of being realistic about their performance.

I have low expectations heading into this game and most of my friends did as well. The Offensive Coordinator, Greg Davis, had sucked out loud for years and had been able to mask his rampant stupidity with the playcalling by fielding superior athletes against most opponents.The problem for Davis was that the 2010 edition of the Longhorns didn’t have a ton of talent on offense, whether folks who didn’t follow things closely, apparently like Greg Davis himself, realized this or not.

On defense, I had plenty of faith in the DC, but very little faith in the lack of size and talent up the middle of the defense. Texas was small at DT, weak at MLB, and worse at Safety. If UCLA could run the ball at all, it wasn’t going to matter how well Will Muschamp schemed the defense.

So the prospects of a big giant letdown for the Horns at home loomed, and they entered the game ranked #7 nationally.

Meanwhile, about 6 months prior, I had visited the UCLA campus on a tour with my daughter. While out visiting, I had picked up some memorabilia including a UCLA shirt.

As I dressed in prep to meet a bunch of buddies for gamewatching at a local sportsbar, I decided I would be an ironically humorous asshole and wear the UCLA shirt.

How could I lose? If Texas won, I’d be happy to be mocked. If UCLA won, it would be funny to hear the whining from friends. So I wore it.

As the game unfolded and Texas was getting its ass kicked by a team that would eventually go 5-7 or 4-8, our cheers became jeers at the television. I forgot what shirt I was wearing and the humor eventually wore off as we became embittered, angry fans.

At one point, Mack Brown offered up his weak-ass clappy clapping after another Texas turnover and I sarcastically clapped back at him on the screen from the middle of the watching area.

That was the moment in which the day was saved for our group. From across the room, a drunken group of dudes dressed in UT garb took apparent exception to my clapping for the Bruins and began to shout obscenities loudly in my direction. I didn’t even notice at first. It wasn’t until another buddy pointed it out because of my shirt and their continued bitching that I noticed.

I stood up to explain as one shouted “Fuck you!!! UCLA sucks!!! Go back to California!!!”. It was at that moment that I chose to become UCLA Fan. I then pointed at the screen for the game and shouted back “SCOREBOARD, BITCHES!!!”. Things escalated from there and my friends and I ended up having food thrown at us basically due to me being an ass and taunting those guys about the score.

Walking by them to the restroom was a somewhat daunting thing, but in doing so, they ultimately got jocular with me on the way back and I told them that I can’t help it if UCLA owns UT (1997, 66-3; 1998, another blowout). After the game they come over and apologized to me for their behavior and told me how much respect they have for UCLA and the program. My friends merely watched in disbelief.

That didn’t make the loss feel much better, but it helped. I like a revived UT tomorrow in the game in Cali, but I do not mind throwing on the UCLA shirt one more time and giving the experience another go.

Hook’em

My Texas football subterfuge, 2010-style.

It never ceases to amaze me how often the word “fair” is used in a manner that benefits the person saying or writing it to the detriment of those to whom the word is being said or written.

“Fair” is usually used when someone is attempting to take something from you and give it to themselves or someone that will ultimately repay them in some way. It’s one of the most dangerous, misunderstood words in the English language.

The only time the word “Fair” makes any sense is when it is being used in regard to gathering of some sort at a city, county, or state level. In short, the term is applicable only when used in conjunction with the concepts of livestock auctions and food eating contests. This is where a “Fair” comes in handy.

Conversely, when the word “Fair” is used in the business world or in regard to money in general, it is being used to the advantage of the person saying the word.

“We feel this is only fair.” “You have to be fair with your counterparties.” “This is a fair offer.” “Everyone should pay their fair share.”

Name a time in which any statement akin to those makes any sense for the person(s) at whom those sentences are directed. The speaker/writer is telling someone else to give something up to the betterment of someone else, in exchange for fulfilling the ethereal concept and apparent societal requirement of “fairness”.

Why is that? What is the actual definition of the term “fair”. How does one define “fairness”?

The answer is always an opinion. There is no subjective way to define the term “fair”. Those that use this word frequently, often use it as a weapon and fully understand why they’re using. It serves as a purpose for them to define the terms of an arrangement, or a game, or a decision. The term is so deeply ingrained as a positive value in Western culture that it is almost a villainous act when a counterparty chooses to rebut someone’s position on what is “fair”. The power is always held in the hands of the person invoking the word. The weaker end rarely is able to muster enough strength to immediately challenge the “fairness” position and accordingly maintain some semblance of objectivity with all parties involved in the particular process and therefore is usually facing an uphill battle in the negotiation.

Is there always a negotiation? Yes. When the word “fair” is used, it is being deployed as a means of balance in a discussion, whether or not balance is needed or helpful. People who wish to believe otherwise are simply leaving their underbellies exposed to those of ill-intent and a better gameplan. Perhaps that kind of sinister concept is too much for us to bare as a reasonable way of viewing society, but only the fools believe for one second that there is any different way to understand the business side of these terms and circumstances.

I had an outside party tell me this during the negotiation of a deal that my business walked away from over a year ago and has now decided to revisit at the other side’s behest. As we looked through the new proposal, it is clear what the term “simplify” means.

“Siimplify” in the business world seems to be used consistently as a euphemism for the notion of reducing something. Usually, it is a term deployed by someone who is proposing to take something off of the table that was previously part of a deal or a negotiation.

“Simplify” is most frequently used by larger corporate or governmental entities when the person responsible for selling a deal on that entity’s end can’t get the messaging across to the powers that be in regard to how the deal makes sense on their end. “Simplify” is only a necessary word when dealing with multiple decisionmakers who aren’t all personally involved with a deal. Anything beyond a simple, up front cash transaction, whether as a part of an ongoing deal or as part of part of M&A discussions, winds up being a problem for the higher ranking grand poobahs that ultimately need to sign off on a deal for the bigger entity to move forward.

Sometimes complexity is important in a deal. The selling party usually derives more value on a deal if they’re choosing to sell sooner than having reached a point of maturity in the business. An “earn-out” is a solid way for the selling party to gain value on future returns for the product, service, or business they’re selling while still reaping up-front rewards on the deal as well. It’s a way for both sides to pay $$ and receive $$ for what they think the project is worth without the buying party having to take all of the monetary risk up-front on an incomplete project. Without someone strong internally at the buying, an usually larger, entity, complexity often gets eschewed by the Powers That Be in exchange for “simplifying” the deal, which usually includes cheapening the deal for the seller.

Big deals with big entities need a strong Charon to cross the River Styx of the bigger entity bureaucracy. If you’re going to enter a deal with a big player, you’d better make damned sure that the guide on your trip inside their walls has a clue what he/she is doing. You’ll be able to figure that out within the first two meetings or calls if you’ve been to the dance before and paid attention.

How do you identify the strength of the counterparty carrying the proposed deal early?

First, never accept an opponent’s NDA without edits. Better yet, propose your own. They should get that through, or without, legal approval in a matter of two business days and to completion with you. If not, then they are either without enough power to carry a deal or without the sense of urgency that smaller organizations need from counterparties as a means of thriving on growth towards profitability.

Next, just ask for clarity on the counterparty’s approval process internally when it comes to getting a deal done. Anything that involves more than two steps is busted from the jump. Either “if I want the deal, I can sign for it” or “my boss (or a committee) is the only other person that has to approve it besides me” will suffice as answers. Beyond that, light the cigarette now because you are fucked. The deal may or may not get done, but that winds up being beyond your powers.

So that should “simplify” your deal risk completion. Otherwise you wind up pussyfooting around with someone who is probably just a Time Thief at the end of your day, and that kind of crime can kill your company.

Everyone needs an outlet. Some folks need more than one. Some folks need many. I’ve found that I need many, so tumblr is going to be a new extension for me. Color me indifferent as to whether anyone else reads these, but I plan to be entertained.

There are things that I cannot do as me in the business world. There are things I cannot say in the business world. There are things I cannot express without being interrupted or seeing disputed. This outlet can remedy those problems.

I run a start-up nearing the point of an exit. I have a blended family including a young wife, older daughter, and young son, with a new girl coming in late 2011/early 2012. Finding the right moves with so many different people depending on those decisions is what I’ve always wanted and yet what I am hoping to sanely live through. Rants and thoughts here will help.